Love/Hate Relationship with My Body

These two have such a love/hate relationship. Similar to the love/hate relationship I have with my body.

Athena and Taz

Deep down I love my body I truly do. If I didn’t than I wouldn’t treat it as good as I now do. It was home to my perfect baby boy for nine months. What’s not to love about that alone! But I hate my body sometimes too. Sometimes my body makes me feel like shit. And quite frankly sometimes I hate how my body looks.

This process has been just that…a process. I was looking for the quick fix. And aren’t we all? But I’ve learned a lot throughout this process. I’ve learned that this is in fact a journey, a lifestyle. It’s not a quick fix. I’ve learned to love my body more. I’ve learned to appreciate it in all its various stages. And I’ve learned to love the progress I’ve made along the way. I’ve allowed myself grace in my inabilities. And I’ve pushed my body harder than I’ve ever pushed it in my entire life.

These past three months have been some of the best but also hardest three months of my life! Again, love/hate. But here I am standing tall. Standing proud! I’m finding more and more each day just how much I LOVE my body far more than I hate it. And I’m so stinking excited to pay it forward and help others find more love in their own bodies and in their own lives. Are you ready to join me? I can GUARANTEE that the only regret you will have is that you didn’t join me sooner. And I can PROMISE you, you will never have to go it alone.

Love or hate…you decide. Drop a ❤️ below if you’re ready to join me. And as always, like, comment and tag away or simply check out the link in my bio for more info.

Transformation

Do you notice a difference? I’m not gonna lie I was not expecting one. Nor was I expecting the wave of emotion to come over me this morning that smacked me right up side the face!!! I am rarely at a loss for words but as I type this I find myself so caught up in those emotions that I’m struggling to put pen to paper and express what I am feeling in this very moment.

I realized this morning that it has been quite a while since I had updated my side by side from the very start of my journey to now. I am so focused on taking things day by day, week by week and sometimes just praying to get through that one particular moment that I hadn’t really looked back at how far I had come up to now. Can anyone else relate?

Sometimes life goes by so fast and we get so busy it’s easy to forget just how far we’ve come. But as I put my updated side by sides together I just started bawling. I cannot believe that was me, is me! This is me!!! This is how far I’ve come. No filter, no editing, no sucking it in, no makeup, horrible lighting and all…it’s me, the real me, all of me. This is how far I have come.

I am overcome with emotion and excitement! I am so stinkin proud of myself! I am down 12.9lbs and 34” overall in two months time!!! The Shred Plan, the Superfood Shake, the workouts, the accountability and support…all of it got me to this point. No smoke and mirrors here! This is the real deal! What are you waiting for? Join me! Let’s crush this together!!!

If you are ready to make the BEST decision of your life drop a 🔥below or send me a DM. And as always, like, comment and tag away!

Let’s Celebrate!!!

For almost two years I sat back like a fly on the wall as a Beachbody customer never ever completing a single program let alone making it past week two in most cases. I ate like garbage, I didn’t drink Shakeology, I didn’t work the tools I had been given. I literally had everything I needed to succeed yet I sat on my ass and just watched. Watched others succeed. Watched others crush their goals. Watched others overcome their obstacles. I repeatedly asked my self “why not me?” Um, duh! Because I didn’t put in the work! It’s not rocket science!

Well guess what folks…yesterday I pushed play on the final workout of Beachbody’s LIIFT4 program. It is the first program in almost two years that I have completed in its entirety and the first program I have now completed as a coach! And let me just say, I bawled my eyes out! And I am not shameful in admitting that at all!!! I did the workouts, I drank the Shakeology, I followed the shred plan. I put action behind the tools I had been given and crushed my goals!

I am down 9.3lbs and 27.5” in eight weeks! And I did it all while living and loving life! I didn’t deprive myself of my cravings! I enjoyed my poolside cocktails and Marshmallow Dream Bars. I ate up all the Philly Cheesesteaks and Juicy Lucy’s the hubby whipped up on our new @blackstoneproducts griddle! I certainly did NOT starve!!! I followed the program, I used the tools, I trusted the process. And in doing so I’ve achieved so much!

But I’m not stopping here. I will continue on to the next program on Monday. Who’s going to join me? Just take a look below at my four week results. Why only four weeks??? Because I was too scared and ashamed to take my photos at day one and I regret that decision every single day.

Down 9.3lbs and 27.5” in eight weeks.
Down 9.3lbs and 27.5” in eight weeks.

Stop being a fly on the wall! Stop watching me crush my goals. Stop sitting back and watching me succeed asking yourself, “why not me?”

Why not you??? That’s the question I ask of you. Whether as a coach or simply as a customer I am here to help you succeed. Stop waiting. Stop watching. Simply put action behind your goals. Tag a friend who might need some extra inspiration! Drop a ❤️ if you’re ready to join me.

Self-Care

It’s definition is uniquely different from person to person but equally as important to each individual at the same time. For me, I didn’t even know where the hell to get started! But through practice, patience and persistence I found enjoyment in things like skin care, personal development, bible study, and playing around with makeup. Simply put, I started working on ME.

As a mother I’ve learned the hard way just how important self-care is! Learn from my mistakes. Don’t repeat them. It took over four years for me realize that in order for my son and husband to get the very best of me I have to love and care for myself first.

Man was it a hard pill to swallow! It felt so incredibly gut wrenchingly selfish! But once I gained some direction and momentum I became unstoppable!

Beachbody gave me direction. My up line coach and the AMAZING team that I am a part of gave me the inspiration, support and momentum. This isn’t a scam! It’s the real deal! The work you put in is given back to you ten fold and then some! I’m not blowing smoke up your ass here guys…this is legit! What on earth are you waiting for? Hop on board with me and enjoy the best ride of your life!!! I promise you will NOT be disappointed.

Share this with someone who might need a swift kick in the ass. Drop your favorite emoji below if you’re ready to hop on board.

Excuses Are Like Weeds

Excuses are like weeds! You give them an inch and they will gladly take over!

Take responsibility and initiative for yourself. Stop blaming your circumstances on others. Stop blaming where you are at on things you have the power to change. Absolutely NO ONE is too busy! It’s a matter of priorities people!!! I used to use the excuse ALL the time that there just weren’t enough hours in the day to get it all done! Seriously! Ask any of my family and closest friends and they will attest to it! As a matter of fact three years ago almost to the day I actually posted on my Facebook that there just weren’t enough hours in the day to get everything done. Thank you Facebook memories for the reminder on how far I have come. I used that excuse DAILY! But truth was, I was just plain LAZY!

It’s time to take care of those excuses just like you would the weeds in your yard. Time to cut that shit out and hose it down with some serious weed killer.

Not enough time? I can help you.

You don’t know where to start? I can help you.

Not enough money? I can help you.

You have bad habits? I can help you.

You don’t know what to eat? I can help you.

You’ve never worked out a day in your life? I can help you.

You’re scared? I can help you.

Make yourself and your health a priority! Excuses will always be there, opportunity won’t. Take this opportunity! Don’t let it pass you by! The time is now. It’s your time to shine! Tag a friend who needs to hear this. Drop a 🌟 below if you’re ready!

Celebrate the Non-Scale Victories

I woke up this morning feeling a little bummed. I was up 1.2lbs when I stepped on the scale. It didn’t come as much of a surprise as I thoroughly enjoyed my Mother’s Day weekend and all the treats and lazy poolside play that came along with it. But that’s where the feeling ended folks! Right there at that scale.

The old me would’ve declared it the worst day ever and thrown in the towel giving up on the entire day. My butt would’ve immediately curled up on the couch under a blanket and I would’ve sat there binge watching garbage TV, wallowing in self pity, only getting up to stuff my face or pee.

But today I decided to push play instead and CRUSH my workout! I gave my workout my absolute all! I gave it everything I had and increased my weights wherever I could. Afterwards I felt I better and was proud of myself for getting it done. I gave myself a little pat on the back and continued on with my day.

However, the real magic didn’t happen until after I showered and changed. I walked into my closet and grabbed a random t-shirt from a still unpacked box tucked in the back corner, honestly thinking it was one of my husband’s men’s size large shirts. I threw it over my head and walked past the mirror and y’all…it was this shirt…a shirt I got free from a bar way back when I was 21 years old. This shirt is one I haven’t seen in YEARS and one that I haven’t fit into in even more time than that. This shirt right here is a women’s size medium. Talk about a non-scale victory!!!

So tonight I am celebrating! But I am not celebrating this non-scale victory alone! I have the most AMAZING team to back me up and celebrate right along with me. If you want to join me on my journey drop a ❤️ below. I guarantee your life will change. And I will be right by your side every step of they way. Let’s celebrate each other’s victories together!!!

The Day I Chose to Take Charge of My Life

Flashback to just over a month ago…I was standing in front of the bathroom mirror after a shower dripping in sweat when it hit me…the triple digits here in AZ were just around the corner which means pool season will be upon us before I know it. Yet here I am at my heaviest weight since giving birth to my son 4 years ago!!!

I grabbed my stomach flab, did a spin and fell to my knees. Tears rolling down my face I was sobbing uncontrollably. Sobbing out loud for only God to hear. I felt defeated. I felt weak. I felt so uncomfortable in my own skin. I did not recognize my own reflection any longer and that scared the shit out of me! So many questions came flooding in…How on earth did I let this happen? Why on earth did I let this happen? How in the world can I expect anyone to love me if I don’t love myself?

There were two questions that I DIDN’T have to ask…How did I get here? and What am I going to do to change things? I knew in that very moment what needed to be done. The excuses were no longer acceptable. I knew I was eating wrong and sitting on my ass every chance I had. I knew I had all the tools in the world right at my fingertips to be able change my life. So I picked myself up off the floor, dried my tears, swallowed hard and took the plunge. I made the decision to become a Beachbody Coach and couldn’t be happier!!!

For the first time in FOREVER I simply put myself first. Over the last 5 weeks I have given my all to focusing on eating right, working out, taking better care of both my body and mind and strengthening my relationship with God. I’m down 7.5lbs and I feel amazing!!! I’m becoming the absolute best version of myself that I can be. And guess what?!? My husband and son get to experience the best version of me every step of the way too!

A fire has been lit deep within and I feel unstoppable! I have found my passion. I have found direction. I’m kicking ass and taking names! My goal is to INSPIRE, ENCOURAGE, UPLIFT and EMPOWER each and every one of you to do the same. I’ve teamed up with one of the top teams in the country and I invite you to join me on my journey. WE ARE STRONGER TOGETHER!!! Drop a 💪🏼 below if you’re ready to join me. Or simply click here!

These Hands

These hands are the heart and soul of the family. Cracked, swollen and bleeding they show visible signs of the love and hard work that’s put in on a daily basis to make the household run smoothly.

The scrubber of toilets and floors. The cleaner of messes and spilled milk. The washer of dishes and clothes. The wiper of tears and the comforter of sorrows. The creator of crafts and doer of experiments. The washer of hands over and over and over again. These hands go through it all!

The responsibilities are endless but these hands never quit. Nor does the woman behind these hands.

I wear an abundance of hats and hold many different titles. My hands help me juggle it all. My hands are the heart and soul of our family. Cracked, swollen and bleeding they show visible signs of how much I love my family and how hard I work on a daily basis to make our household run smoothly.

10 Year Challenge – Bring on the New Year!!!

As the end of a decade comes to a close I thought I would take a look back at the past ten years. A lot has changed for me that’s for sure!

Ten years ago I was unsettled, insecure, out of control and completely lost in my drinking. I had so many plans for the future that never seemed to come to fruition. I was spinning my wheels and going nowhere fast. I was a mess to say the very least. But the minute I gave up, and hit rock bottom I found new friends, true friends! And had my family by my side every single step of the way. I am forever grateful to my friend Alicia, and especially my sister Christina and Brother-in-Law Evan for taking the absolute brunt of my downward spiral. They picked me right back up and stood by my side through it all. The road was dark and scary.

But slowly I learned to stand on my own two feet. I learned that drinking away my sorrows only worsened my problems. I gained more confidence and strength. I learned that I was stronger than I ever thought before. I was capable of anything. I was no longer dependent on a man or any other person to fulfill me. I learned exactly what I needed and wanted in life, in a relationship and for my future to be truly happy. I found myself!!!

The very minute I stopped looking for a man to complete me was the minute I found my now husband, Justin. Now here we are present day, married and with a son living across the country and we couldn’t be happier! Motherhood has changed me immensely and it is hands down the most favorite part of my identity. This last decade has brought many ups and also downs and there have been far too many “greatest of all time” moments for me to select just one.

The past ten years have been tough guys I’m not going to lie or sugar coat it. But I have come so far from where I’ve been there is no looking back! I respect the past and all its lessons but I am ready to run forward and conquer! I wouldn’t change a single thing because I firmly believe I needed to walk the hard road to get to where I am at. I was meant to experience all I went through. Without it I wouldn’t be able to truly appreciate all that I have today.

If I could go back ten years and speak to my past self I would hug her tight, let her know how strong of a women she is and will continue to be. I would tell her she is loved and appreciated and even if she can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel don’t ever ever give up because all her dreams will in fact come true.

Trust the process. The path might not be what we hope for or expect but the end result is always worth it.

My word for the upcoming year is COMMITTED. I am committed to taking care of myself both mentally and physically. Committed to taking care of my family. Committed to being the best spouse and mother I can be. Committed to making our house a home and safe place from the stressors of the world. Committed to God. Committed to giving back to others. Committed to learning and growth. Committed to doing all that I can to prepare for homeschooling Hunter. Committed to strengthening friendships. Committed to adventure and new experiences. Committed to growing my blog. IN 2020 I WILL BE COMMITTED!

How about you? Can you pick a favorite moment, memory or trend from the past decade? What is your word for the upcoming year? Share in the comments below.

2009

2019

Road Tripping Cross Country with a Toddler, a Dog and a Stubborn Husband

I absolutely love road trips! Always have. My very first experience with a cross country road trip was with my Dad. We drove to Florida for my high school graduation gift/trip. It was one of my favorite trips of all time! We drove from Wisconsin to Bonita Springs, Florida only stopping for gas and bathroom breaks and a very brief nap stop at a Rest Stop along the way. We packed loads of snacks and beverages and activities to keep us occupied.

Now here we are present day and my love for road trips remains the same. Unfortunately Justin does not share that same love and excitement and tends to be a bit grouchy and stubborn. But we still go on small road trips here and there to satisfy my enjoyment of them. Usually they’re just day trips to explore various parts of the state. We call them “adventure days” to add some extra excitement for Hunter and try to take them at least a couple times per month. But cross country trips are a whole different animal.

We’ve been on on multiple cross country trips to and from Wisconsin with Hunter. The first one being our move to Arizona. But this holiday season will be our first cross country trip that he will remember. Not even two hours in and we’ve been asked countless times “are we there yet?” and “why can’t we just fly to Wisconsin and get there faster?” We’ve also had to make our first emergency roadside potty stop because the first Rest Stop we came to was closed.

Emergency Potty Stop.

I should also mention that I’m an over-packer. To think that I thought that we could fit two weeks worth of stuff for all three of us into one suitcase is laughable. Between our stuff, the dogs stuff and all the Christmas gifts we are packed to the gills! But because this isn’t my first rodeo we are packed strategically and are well prepared for the unforeseen and unexpected. We’ve got loads of snacks, beverages and activities to keep us occupied.

Experience and overpacking will all come in handy as Justin is insisting that we drive straight through yet again this trip. It’s important to point out that any time we’ve tried to do this in the past has resulted in everyone being cranky and over tired. Not to mention resulting in the most grouchy form of a husband to ever have existed. But I being happily optimistic and extremely excited for the adventure am just going to go with the flow and enjoy the experience.

Arizona – Depending on the route you take there is so much to see. The varying landscape as you cross the state is just beautiful. But man does that temperature drop as you near the state line! Definitely need to be sure to have the winter jackets handy before entering New Mexico. We made the mistake of having our coats in the bed of the truck and only having light sweatshirts in the truck. Our first pit stop in New Mexico was so so so cold without jackets! Our bodies are not used to 32 degree weather any longer that’s for sure!

New Mexico – Not much to see until about Albuquerque. The city lights break up the monotonousness of night time driving. Unfortunately most rest stops are closed this time of year so truck stops are your best bet for a bathroom break and opportunity to stretch your legs.

Texas – Our time in Texas was brief. At this point we had been on the road for 12 hours. Hunter was hitting his limit and starting to spiral. It didn’t help that for some reason he and I got hit with random allergies out of nowhere so we were stuffy and sneezing something fierce throughout our time in the state. Thank goodness for my overpacking skills…saline Boogie Wipes to the rescue! Apparently according to Justin the towns we drove through smelled like pigs and piss but I was too stuffed up to smell a thing! Thank goodness!!! Shortly after Hunter’s meltdown he fell asleep. Coolest thing we saw was a Toot n’ Totum. Thought it was a unique name for a gas station. Never seen one before. Oh I should also mention that at this point of the trip Justin’s stubbornness really started to shine. He was still insistent that we drive straight though. Jesus take the wheel! We didn’t make it much further before Hunter started having night terrors.

Texas Toot n’ Totum

Oklahoma – I slept through the Oklahoma panhandle but before I dozed off I did catch a glimpse of the moon. It was HUGE and shown brightly resembling the giant grin of the Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland. After a couple of night terror episodes with Hunter we did end up parking at a truck stop at the Oklahoma/Kansas state line so we could all get some rest. Thankfully I packed plenty of blankets and some neck pillows so we could all snuggle up in the front seats of the truck for a few hours before hitting the road again.

Kansas – I was on point as driver and got to enjoy the beauty and peacefulness of the sunrise all to myself while Justin and Hunter slept. Hunter woke up in such a great mood! He didn’t remember a thing from his terrible night prior and that made me happy. Justin and I were pretty grouchy at this point. The snacking and fast food stops were starting to hit me and made me feel like garbage. I don’t remember much of Kansas other than the sound of the radio playing softly in the background while we zoned out.

Missouri – By the time we hit Missouri I was starting to go coo coo for Cocoa Puffs. I was dancing and singing along with the radio and desperate to find a comfortable position. It didn’t work but I am certain that I gave the other cars we passed a good laugh at my crazy antics. Justin even cracked a smile here and there though he won’t admit it. Any and every stop we made was filled with a good old fashioned snowball fight and the occasional snow angel with what of any remnants were left behind from the previous snowfall all led by Hunter.

Iowa – We’re almost there! Nothing noteworthy to mention really. We were all kinda hitting our limit. Dubuque however was super cute and industrial. I wish we had driven through during the day so I could’ve seen more. The second our wheels hit the Dubuque/Wisconsin Bridge to cross the Mississippi River Hunter was cheering with excitement.

Welcome to Iowa!

Wisconsin – We have arrived!!! We are exhausted and hangry and so beyond ready to get out of this truck but we are on the home stretch. Only about two more hours to go! Hunter kept Justin and I positive with his excitement that we were actually in Wisconsin! The lack of snow is a little bit of a bummer for little man. Thank goodness all our Missouri stops included snowball fights. Annnddd…we FINALLY made it!!! Oh my gosh I almost forgot…Athena!!! I haven’t mentioned her at all this entire trip because she did the BEST out of all of us! She slept the entire way. But we did have the BringFido app downloaded and ready to go in the event we did need to stop at a hotel during our trip. It’s the fastest and easiest way to find a place to stay that accepts pets of any kind. I highly recommend. Now to unload our stuff, get some much needed rest and enjoy the holiday festivities!!!

If you live in or have visited any of the states we drove through let me know in the comments below what things there are to do and see! We make this trip every other year for the holidays and would really like to include more stops along the way that involve some sort of activity to break the trip up a bit more.